Sometimes we look for what we think we need in the wrong way. If you need help for shyness, don’t let preconceived ideas limit what you may be able to do for your well being. The conception that shyness is something you must get rid of is not in your best interest, and continually questioning how you can overcome it or what causes it does not bring you any closer to a solution.
Instead of thinking about getting away from shyness, the proactive action should be to think about moving toward something else. Opposition to anything is not the way to grow, and change does not come from resisting, but in focusing on doing something else.
Before You Get There
Because shyness is a condition not faced by everyone, it is easy to be hurt by those around you, even those who love you. The hurt is part of the process and has to be dealt with, but it must be viewed as a passing inconvenience. The poet Rilke addressed this when he said, “Feel it and keep moving because you deserve to be happy.” The pain gives reason for wanting to move on to something else.
How to Incorporate Change
Understanding the part of you that you want to change is the first step to moving there. Shyness is not an enemy, but protects you from many bad things. You must identify all your important features, not just the shy one, so you can change only what needs to be different. If you only see yourself as shy, you can’t expect to change because shyness can’t instigate other emotions.
This should make it clear why trying to get rid of shyness only reinforces it. If you become more aware of the other parts of your personality, you can circumvent the shyness and realize true change in your life. Those other parts are the natural gifts you have, the tendencies you follow, talents you possess or learn, and many other important parts of your character that are missed when you concentrate on shyness alone.
Remember the Positive
Everyone has sub-personalities that surface from time to time. This might be evident when someone you know has a bad day, or does something that you don’t identify with them. Not all sub-personalities are bad or detrimental; in fact, they are instrumental in helping you deal with shyness.
If you do not allow yourself to be led by shyness, you can awaken those sub-personalities that make for change and produce a better person in the process. Think of times in your past when you were creative, happy, showed courage in the face of danger, or experienced adventurous activities. If there are times in your past when you experienced these other personality traits, it proves you have the ability to change.
You may not be able to conjure up these sub-personalities as you wish until you gain the confidence you need. If you are like millions of other shy people, you have probably tried just about everything you know of to get rid of that personality trait. Now’s the time to get some Help for Shyness that will actually do you some good. Move on with your life; don’t dwell on the negative aspect of putting your shyness away. Follow the link to discover how to relieve your shyness problem.
It’s not too late for you to energize those other emotions and break out of the shyness mold. Here’s the way it’s done! ====> ====> ====>